Tea Time With Jesse

Six of One, Half Dozen the Other

Archive for the ‘Asshole Jobs’ Category

Asshole Jobs – Continued

Posted by middlerage on May 12, 2011

It has been a while since I’ve posted about evil jobs. See the original post for an explanation of this category.

I thought of another profession that makes me grit my teeth – the upseller. No, I’m not talking about the regular schmo who’s job it is to try to get you to buy something additional. I should really call the asshole job The Upseller Strategist – this is the executive, behind the scenes, who comes up with the clever idea that customer service shouldn’t be the  priority of his/her company. Rather the priority should be customer squeezing. This is the person that forces the regular schmoes to try and upsell the customer. This person is evil on two fronts: first they are a major annoyance to the customer with  their “revenue enhancing” strategies like, “Let me tell you about our service contracts. If anything should go wrong with your new washer in the first 3 years…blah blah blah”; “If you should become disabled and can’t work, our plan will pay off your credit card…”; “Would you like a hot apple pie with that?” Secondly they are a major annoyance to the front line workers who must add a push to each transaction. Instead of just enjoying helping each customer out, they now have to become assholes or lose their job. Paste on a shit-eating grin and say, “Thankyou sir, I’ve posted that to your account. Now I’d like to tell you about our Money Market Account…”

Additional to the executive Upseller Strategist is the oily middle manager who gets to crack the whip but not have to piss off the customer: “I’m sorry, Mary, but you are ending each transaction with ‘Have a nice day’ instead of the mandated ‘Can I tell you about our Money Market account’, I’m afraid you’ll have to take remedial training.”


Posted in Asshole Jobs, observations | 5 Comments »

What’s Your Price to Perform for a Dictator?

Posted by middlerage on February 24, 2011

apparently, some recent exposure by Wikileaks has shown that Beyonce, Mariah Carey and Usher have all performed at private parties for the sons of Libyan tyrant Qadhafi. Quoting from black spokesweb, the Grio:

[…]what were these performers thinking when they accepted these gigs? Do stars like Usher, Mariah Carey and Beyoncé consider themselves culpable for the crimes of their employers by accepting their cash? And perhaps more to the point, and especially given recent events, should we, as music fans, concerned U.S. citizens, and consumers of media, hold them responsible?

What were they thinking, indeed. And the answer is yes, I will hold them responsible, though not exactly sure how.

I’m old enough to remember Steven van Zandt’s protest of Sun City in Apartheid South Africa. The Grio also mentions this:

Of course, Beyoncé, Mariah, and Usher aren’t the first performers who have been criticized for performing in countries where human rights abuses have occurred.

Some may remember the famous “Sun City” protests of the 1980s, when a group of artists came together to protest performances at a resort in South Africa that catered to wealthy white tourists in Apartheid South Africa. Many famous entertainers had performed at the resort, despite its racist policy, until “Little Steven” Van Zandt put together a protest music project and invited the contributions of over 50 artists including Bruce Springsteen, Peter Gabriel, Miles Davis, Bob Dylan, Run-DMC, Lou Reed, Bonnie Raitt, Bono, Melle Mel, Keith Richards, Jackson Browne, and George Clinton. The artists on the record vowed never to perform at Sun City so long as it remained segregated, because to do so would in their minds be tantamount to an acceptance of apartheid.

File this under Asshole Jobs. Nuff, said.

(I’m especially disappointed in Carey, who turned in a stellar performance in the movie Precious. If you haven’t seen Precious, you need to. Amazing movie.)

Posted in Asshole Jobs | 2 Comments »

Hidden Fees

Posted by middlerage on January 21, 2011

Fees in banking and finance are big news these days, what with banks making enormous profits off of charges and congress posturing to protect the average folk. However, there are unexpected fees in other parts of life that really ignite the ol’ middlerage. The city where I used to live had a great downtown park that was often the scene of eclectic music concerts. I saw a lot of groovy bands there, and it was a short walk from my apartment. Some of the concerts were held to aid some charity or another, and I would commonly hear a radio announcement that such and such was playing tonight with a $5 suggested donation. When I would arrive there would be no “suggested” about it, there was a mandatory admission at a bouncer guarded gate. AND YET. And yet, the establishment was still saying, “donate your $5 over there and get your wrist band…” Now I don’t mind if you go ahead and call it an “admission” and give it all to charity and pat yourself on the back. I’ll still come. But “admission” is honest, while “donation” implies CHOICE. Come on, there was no choice except to turn around and go home. Call a spade a spade.

Likewise, my oldest is currently in organized basketball. There was an $80 registration fee – mentioned on the information packet; and a mandatory $14 insurance charge – also mentioned in the information packet. Cool, it costs $94 for my kid to play basketball…. except it doesn’t. It actually costs, at a minimum, $114 for my kid to play, because NOT MENTIONED in the information packet is the $2 game-day admission per adult. If my kid is 13, 14, or older,  I can drop him/her at the door and come back in an hour. But 5, 6, and 7 year olds need a parent at the game, if not for legal reasons, at least for psychological reasons. I’m not abandoning my 6 year old at the door. So out comes another 2 bucks.

Obviously, an extra $20 bucks per season is a pittance, but it is the honesty of the thing. Come on, give me the actual, upfront price for all of it. I get shafted enough by corporations and their hidden fees. I don’t need from my fellow citizens.

This blog post is brought to you by the angry letter I didn‘t send to the athletic association. I can vent my psychosis to the virtualsphere and avoid branding my kid as the offspring of a raging nut.

Posted in Asshole Jobs, kids, observations, short ones, Thinking 'bout music, wtf | 1 Comment »

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